Saturday 23 April 2011

a child's mind

She sat on the boot of the old bmw..throwing stones in the "suwe" game board she had drawn on the floor.

"Where is tona?" She thought."By now she should be done with her afternoon nap and in the back yard to play"

Times like this she really hated not having siblings closer to her own age.she was 12yrs old and her sister was barely even walking yet.

There weren't a lot of kids her age living in the block of flats she lived in.just her,tona,femi and chinedu.."You can only ever play police and thief or football with them.boys are so useless" she thought to herself

She started to hop in the box she had drawn on the ground.

"u r playing by urself,where is tona?"

She turned around and saw her neighbour from block A,uncle tony. Even tho he was only a few years older than her elder brother it only seemed right to call a man with beards and a moustache that full uncle.when she was 23 she would expect the same from kids

"Yes its just me today.I think she's still sleeping or her mum isn't letting her come out to play"

"Y don't u go home then" he asked

"I will soon" she lied..the truth is home had become shallow..mum and dad were always fighting now and that's on those rare occassions he bothered to come home

"I'll play with u then." And this was how her friendship with uncle tony began

It became a natural occurence to play with him whenever tona didn't show up and from playing and talking in the backyard he invited her to his flat to watch movies.he told such interesting stories about university and he always bought her fanta and okin biscuit(her favourite).

"Will u marry me?" He asked one day.
"Marry?" She laughed "uncle tony I'm not even 13 yet"
"You don't have to call me uncle u know.ur a big girl.besides my mum got married when she was 13" he replied

She felt flustered and flattered..uncle tony wanted to marry her.she would have to wait a few years for her parents to accept it but they would be engaged from now.

He kissed her then.she kissed back...nothing strange about kissing besides she loved him and she was going to marry him soon.this is how it worked on tv

He started taking of her panties.."Tony no!" She wasn't stupid.of course she knew all about sex.she also knew she was going to stay a virgin till she got married

"Why not?,I know ure a virgin but don't worry it only hurts a little"

"NO!" she got up and ran home

Thoughts flying through her head.."But this is what grown ups do,now he'll think I'm childish".."But I'm staying a virgin till my wedding night" "but then I'm going to marry tony so isn't this only normal?he acted like it was".."No I will not do such"

D next day,
"I'm sorry about yesterday,u are still young.don't worry it won't happen till we marry or ur in university" tony says

Friendship continues

1week later in tony's living room..
He starts to kiss her again,his hands are roaming all over her young body..she starts to resist.
"I knw I said ill wait but I'm a man,this is what people together do and no1 waits till marriage anymore,we are getting married so what's the point.don't you love me?should I look elsewhere"

Panic grips her..thoughts running through her young mind.this was the only male in her life she could trust now.her father had disappointed her.she couldn't bare to lose this one too.she froze

He continued his assault of her young body..slipped down her panties and touched her "there".her eyes closed the whole time,she couldn't look
"Ure so pretty..just relax okay.this is normal.ur a big girl now"
All of a sudden she felt something that felt like a knife cutting her and screamed from the pain and panic.she couldn't even recognize her own voice.every ounce of her wished a neighbour would barge in and save her..is this what he called a little?he held his hand over her mouth "shh its okay..it'll soon go"
She lay there still.."Grownups enjoyed this?" She thought as the tears steamed down

The end

I've seen alotta blogs lately on obvious rape so I thought to twist it a little.. A lot of guys nowadaiz see this as very normal.
I see alotta tweets where guys are checkin out babes that are nowhere near legal and they say "with an ass like that?she's grown jor"
Who is to blame here?..

Where to draw the line

Been a minute since I blogged..I was starting to wonder if I'd end up being a "one blog wonder" hehe

Anyone who came on this blog n saw d topic n thought "rape"..guess what!! *drum roll* u're wrong (-_-)

I've read a few rape blogs lately n I thought.."We need a breather"..my next post tho..*in 51 iweka rd onitsha voice* WATCHOUT!

Anyone who's atheist or even semi atheist probably won't relate to this blog much but the question is..how do you know when to draw the line between God and science?

Today I was talking about genotype testing between couples and it got me thinking..we all know 2 people who are AS are adviced against marriage because scientifically they have a high chance of producing an offspring that has sickle cell anemia"

Now Mr A falls in love with Miss C..its all rosy..they've been dating for a while,its gettin serious..they are starting to think "forever"..next step..genotype testing(now I knw its adviceable 2knw this before dating anyone but let's just assume 4assumption sake uve made d mistake of not knowin..like ur resident doctor who doesn't know her genotype(moi X_x)

If you are in this case and u find out that u are both AS even though u have prayed and fasted already and Gods approval is there would u ignore the science and risk the possibility of an AS child or would u put ur faith aside and think of what a child with sickle cell anemia would suffer and just end the relationship?

Tuesday 29 March 2011

You against yourself

I read two blogs this morning and somehow i finally got inspiration to start a blog...i mean my followers on twitter have been looking for a way to get my long ass essays off their tl's for a while now so i bet this would have them jumping for joy.

The 1st blog was pandas blog on how women think all men are asses and men think women are money grubbing sluts and the other blog was laide's blog which pretty much validated panda's(i bet that blog inspired his :p)

i really felt both blogs,laides as a girl and pandas as a regular human being who's just tired of seeing everyone bundled up under the same "umblerra" (i just had to do that (-_-) ).it rily is a difficult task to not let a few bag eggs ruin the whole crate though.lets face it,if u buy a crate of eggs and the 1st six were all rotten on cracking them open what are the odds that u would bother with the rest in the same crate and not just throw the whole thing out?how many people will bother cracking open the remaining eggs thinking "this just might be the fresh one"?

life experiences have a way of shaping our personalities but we still have a choice.do u wanna let your experiences turn u into a pessimist?live your life with the fear of the unknown?or would you just take your shot hoping and believing the best?

one thing ive learnt is pessimism is a "lose all the way" situation(im still working on being an optimist).for example..you're in a relationship and you spend all your time worrying it might all be lies.hes after the sex/shes after the money,at the end of the day these fears would either crash something that could have been potentially good or even if your fears were right you spent so much time worrying you never even got to be happy and enjoy the good parts or the benefits.so really?whats the point of the preformed notion and fears based on the rotten seeds you have eaten or watched others eat?

its not always easy,especially when you've never seen it go right.I for one am having an absolute rough time being someones girlfriend.not because he gives me grief or anything but because he's actually good to me.it leaves me paranoid and too scared to enjoy it because im not used to being happy in a relationship(shockin right?i mean as hot and lovely and awesome as i am,u would think guys would have more sense..hehe)There are days i think "what if theres some hidden agenda?""what if its just lies and lyrics"?the key is learning to reply yourself with "what if there isn't" "what if its all true and you have a good thing going on"...heck positivity never hurt anyone.even if they do turn out to be scum at some point u would have at least been happy


It also helps to surround yourself with people who would drill positive thoughts in your head and not propagate the negative ones you are already battling with.1 key thing i've learnt with relationships is "privacy is key"(this doesnt now mean under-g o or nobody knows ur seeing someone *side eye*) on days you rily need to talk,you are better off talking to someone who is in a relationship too.Not because all your single friends are unhappy for you but the thing is most times they do tend to say things or give u advice that will endup with you spending alot of time eating baskin robbins on the couch with your fellow singles and bashing the opposite sex.
The other day i was having a conversation with a friend of mine about my bf and she said "when he has used bb money to go get booty" and i'm like "you make it sound like he came all the way here for action,abeg jor he loves me do i have gold down there that he'd catch a plane for that" and she goes "see you there are some guys that booty is more than gold for them o".now i know her well enough to know this was a totally harmless convo and just teasing but i still spent the whole of that night wondering if it really was mainly a booty call...


forgive my lengthy blog...you know me,i can talk X_X and im getting tired of typing sef.its not easy typing without my usual twitter and bb shorthand...hehe
life will always give us what its going to give us so we might as well only do things and foster thoughts that keep us happy,pray and hold on to our faith


my 1st blog...yayyy..hehe